Malcolm: Friend or Foe?

Foe:
Malcolm is a plague that is threatening to engulf the ASFA race. He is the most disgusting piece of bullshit that we, as decent, upstanding people, ever had the misfortune to meet. As expert Jessica Bonds puts it, "You suck, you homo piece of faggotry", "You aren't worth the time it takes to spit on your diseased fat", "If I was your mother, I would have fed you to tigers", "You would look more attractive if your face was crawling with maggots", and "You walk as if you had an ox in your back pocket." Jessica is an expert in identifying the underbelly of society, so her opinion is very valid. He sucks because he is a pedophile, he is not aesthetically pleasing, he likes himself better than everyone else does, and he wears Crocs. -Jessica Bonds, expert
Friend:
Malcolm is tall, therefore, he can reach stuff on higher shelves when you can't. Malcolm provides amusement in our daily lives. He can block out the sun on a hot day and provide shade. As Ashley Smith says, "He is a sex-pot". - Ashley Smith
Verdict? Undecided