Malcolm: Friend or Foe?

Foe:
Malcolm is a plague that is threatening to engulf the ASFA race. He is the most disgusting piece of bullshit that we, as decent, upstanding people, ever had the misfortune to meet. As expert Jessica Bonds puts it, "You suck, you homo piece of faggotry", "You aren't worth the time it takes to spit on your diseased fat", "If I was your mother, I would have fed you to tigers", "You would look more attractive if your face was crawling with maggots", and "You walk as if you had an ox in your back pocket." Jessica is an expert in identifying the underbelly of society, so her opinion is very valid. He sucks because he is a pedophile, he is not aesthetically pleasing, he likes himself better than everyone else does, and he wears Crocs. -Jessica Bonds, expert
Friend:
Malcolm is tall, therefore, he can reach stuff on higher shelves when you can't. Malcolm provides amusement in our daily lives. He can block out the sun on a hot day and provide shade. As Ashley Smith says, "He is a sex-pot". - Ashley Smith
Verdict? Undecided

Emily Dickinson

Today I was unfortunate enough to be subjected to the poetry of Emily Dickinson, again. Everyone seems to think she is a great poet and some sort of demi-goddess, but I strongly believe that she is autistic. Her poetry is not inspired. It is the ravings of a lunatic and it should be treated as such. Reading Dickinson is not a study in great art, but a study in idiocy.

Library (IRC)

Currently I am in the library at school, also known as the IRC. Our librarian seems to think that she is the reincarnation of Hitler. She promotes her sundry, innane ideas, such as demanding that everyone who walks through the door has a pass and a "legitimate" reason for being there. I miss the days when a person could simply come into the library to pass some time or to study. I am tired of her acting like she's the second coming of Christ.